Thursday, January 31, 2013

Don't Give In Ever

Something like a battery commercial.. it's the little things that sometimes help at just the right moment.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

Meanwhile on Planet Shawn...

Antarctica?  No, my front yard.  The wind comes and night and sweeps a layer of crystalline frost over everything.

Dreams and Stories.

Last night I was in my study, curled up with my lovely wife, watching Warehouse 13.  She had just come home from a women's conference and was dressed in white, pearlescent pink, and pale blue.  I looked on her face lovingly.  My four-year-old daughter was nearby at my painting station intensely painting up some scrap figures.  She's good about washing her brushes afterwards.  She's a very attentive child.

A few days ago she made a little mess on my paint station and when I got home I sat down with her and said "Willow, did you mess up my paint station?"  And she looked at me calmly and said "Dad, I have something to say about that... I'm sorry."  She's very articulate.  And I'm very expository.

The rest of the kids are doing great, going to mini-conferences for home-schooling in a nearby city.  There is a whole infrastructure for that apparently.  We met another family from Springville who is the mirror of the ages of our four children.  They've gone over for a few visits and are getting along famously with their new friends.

I am feeling well in both mind and body.  I'm sleeping well, not going to sleep so early anymore, just a regular time.  Day by day improvement in every aspect of life.  I'm happy.  I kiss my wife and kids good night, put on some Napoleon Hill and drift off to sleep.  When I wake up in the morning I spend as much as an hour in my semi-conscious state and imagine out deeply in my mind exactly how I want things.  Sometimes I pick a year.  For example, the other day I did October 2016 to July 2017 focusing my mind like a beam of light on all the details I could think of.

In 2012 I really set out some ambitious dreams and for the most part answered the question "what do I want?"  I thought it would make me unhappy with my current circumstances seeing as they are so far removed from the dream, but that has not happened.  I still get a sense of peace and contentment with whatever I have now.  I look at my house and think that someday I'll drive by it and think "I used to live there".  However, I don't really want to get rid of this house.  I imagine that in about three years we'll move to something better and use this one as a rental or a retirement home.  Between us Tamie and I have five relatives that are going to be quite old soon (one already is!) and I have to think about taking care of them if  they need it.  I've got to get my own house in good and strong order.

The good samaritan wasn't broke.  He had money to pay an innkeeper to take care of the injured man.  Money gives real power to good intentions.
 This pool is really cool!
 Lots of secret magical places.
 A real place in I think Sweden which is the inspiration for Rivendell.
 This is a real place in Utah (or Colorado)  About the scope and grandeur of Mountain Valhalla v 1.0
 An interior shot that I sort of like.
Entry to Rivendell.  Just a picture, not a real place, but it sure looks real to me.

Here's how I imagine the properties will pan out:
1) Studio in downtown Spanish Fork.
2) Current Home as rental or family refuge.
3) Ancestral Home as permanent for Tamie and I.  Tamie already has a dream home picked out, just a few blocks away actually.  Something like that.
4) Blue Table Academy-- a specialist retreat in nearby mountains with a "family" of painters/artists something like Frank Lloyd Wright did with his architecture company.
5) Mountain Valhalla.  There will be two.  The second will have the scope and grandeur of Rivendell.  I saw a video about the building of the Burj Al Arab and I thought "it is indeed possible to build something like Rivendell."
6-10) Undisclosed.

I'm sure this will change as the years go on.

I think that my progress is a prototype of the possible progress of anyone.  I started out with nothing, even some setbacks, in life.  Started out poor.  Whatever I can achieve any man can achieve.  And what other men have done, so I can do also.  Nothing is out of reach.  I believe inclusively that if mankind set it to mind that we could be colonizing other planets.

Back to Earth: On Saturday I headed down to the studio to get some work done but more importantly to play a rematch batrep vs Imperial Guard with my Tyranids.  This weekend I'm finishing up two Tervigons and that is pretty much the whole thing wrapped up (may add some spore pods).

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Frosted Life

View of my back yard.  It has snowed, then melted then refroze.  On Sunday a frost came and made all the trees a glittering white from top to bottom (not pictured here).  The entire valley like an alien planet.  A mild wind kicked up the frost and it was like the air was full of silver glitter.  Surreal.

My wife has been taking the kids on all sorts of field trips recently.  Since we took our kids out of public school a peace has settled on our lives.  We are like a little tribe and all the learning takes place organically (though we use programmed stuff as well).  Our kids have friends in the neighborhood and meet new people on their outings.  I've found that lack of socialization (a common complaint against home schooling) is simply not the case.  They have more focused relationships, fewer but that make more sense.

Like how I presented a single personal experience as evidence against a supposedly prevailing viewpoint?  All sorts of false logic going on here!

For my part I'm doing extremely well.  I've been worried a lot less recently now that I've really ramped up the fiscal discipline both at home and with the business.  At BTP there is a die-hard book keeper who is keenly interested in the details.  Budgets are discussed carefully with multiple layers of scrutiny.  Home and business were strong before, but it's all planned to the dollar now and projected out many months and (more loosely) years.

The year 2013 is the year of consolidation, self-discipline, and home improvement.  I am turning back to the farm-house to take care of a lot of backlog.  My house needs a lot of attention. It is literally falling apart.  My wife needs a new stove, the kids rooms need new furniture and larger beds.  And a host of smaller things like light-covers, toilet-paper racks, and cupboard hinges.  The yard is a wreck so that's coming in the springtime.

Saturday night my wife and I snuggled up and watched Looper, a very well-constructed sci-fi flick which was way more than we were expecting.  I do recommend.

At my home office I have set up a paint station and I'm working on my fungus nids.  I painted up 64x Termagants over the weekend which is no small feat.  I feel truly at peace when I'm painting.  I just love it and to some extent I miss solo-ing.  I'd love to take on a client project myself and do something special on the side.

What's making me happy right now:

When I owned my game shop in Oregon, right around 1998 I listened to this album all the time.  I ran a Changeling RPG campaign with my wife and four good friends (Joel, Hank, Shawn F., and Arin).  I miss them sometimes.  It was a magic time: newly married and playing games with my young friends, all in our twenties.

What's Next

It's 1am and I came across this neat vid that gave me a bit of inspiration.  Very nice.  You might get something out of it.

My grandmother gave me a wood engraving once, a picture of a ship.  It said "A ship is safe in the harbour, but that's not what a ship is for."  Something like that.

Monday, January 14, 2013

Blue House

Had a moment of bliss this week; the whole family in the car on the way back from church (always a clear-minded time) all the kids singing a song from Bear in the Big Blue House.  I can do a mean Tutter impressions.

 As I mentioned in a previous post our water heater went out and it was a week before the part would be in.  And the fixer-upper guy, Tamie's brother in law (who lives a few doors down) was out of town.  So, for the week we used his bathroom for our showers and baths.  Kenna and I went over on day one to sanitize the whole thing from top to bottom and it took three rounds.  It was like the stink spirit scene from Spirited Away.  He used the (separate) tub to wash his dog.  Just ew.  But we were glad of it, a hot shower every day.  Very nice.

And finally our water heater is back on line.  What a great convenience.
 Sunday night the kids all filed into the room to watch Futurama with me.  Griff has a bandaid on his forehead where his brother accidentally bashed him with a snow shovel.
Willow thinks she's funny.

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

I refuse to believe that life sucks

All right reality, you had better do better than this!  Today is a new day.

But yesterday the car battery died (turns out will need new alternator) and the water heater conked out.  So, I'm holing up at home on New Year's day.  Answering emails and putting up vids but that's about it.  I need a ride to the studio to pick some things up.

I fell fast asleep around 8pm New Year's Eve.  Sad but true.  I'm up so early these days that I tend to just pass out early.